Being a stay at home mom, you are well aware of the gloomy side of motherhood as you feel isolated many times. Husbands of SAHM play a key role to make them feel happy and confident again. You will find many articles for moms on parenting and relationship but you never write much more how husbands can support their wives who are staying at home with kids. Am I right? So here we find out some best advice for husbands of stay at home moms.
The most ridiculous question people will ask you is “What SAHM do all day?”. I need to forget all my goodness of heart when people dare to ask this. Do you feel like me? There are many myths about stay at home moms and we need to break them.
I know husband pay bills but a wife is actually making a place called “HOME”! She is the one who leaves her ambitions and dreams for a family. And she must have to get credit for it rather than lambasted for staying home with kids. The husband has to take care that she will never downcast herself. There are some best survival tips for stay at home mom, you can try out if you are not enjoying as a SAHM.
I am a first-time twin mom who was previously working as an HR consultant ( done graduation in engineering). Let me tell you the truth, in the start, I was frustrated about being a stay at home mom. But I know I made the BEST decision to be SAHM.
There are many misconceptions about SAHM and the majority of people criticize you for your decision. The eyes will roll when they get to know you have a good degree or career before.
If you don’t have a good supportive husband, the journey of being SAHM is terrible. As per stats, it’s proven that stay at home moms have high chances of having depression.
I know how good it was when my husband asks me how was your day, and I answer “terrible” each time. I speak non stop 30 minutes and reveal what was today’s score- score to change diapers, I have twins so multiply each task. You can read more funny things about twin mom HERE. This little question is so IMPORTANT to me. This is the discussion which I want so badly, as it gives me a chance to spill out.
My best advice for husbands of stay at home moms is TALK WITH HER. Give them a chance to speak up what they are feeling every day. Such conversation always strengthens the relationship between you two.
I ask my fellow bloggers ( who are also SAHM) what advice they would like to give to husbands of stay at home mom? Isn’t it wonderful, if you ask SAHM what type of support they need from their husbands?
I ask about their educational qualification too because SAHM is not an underqualified woman who didn’t get a job. My questions are why they choose to be a stay at home and the best advice for husbands of stay at home moms. So let’s deep dive into this amazing discussion.
Best Advice For Husbands of Stay At Home Moms
Taylor Lee – TN, USA
Ed. S. (Specialist Degree- Post Masters) in Counseling
Hey there! My name is Taylor and I chose to be a SAHM because I thoroughly enjoy being home to raise and teach my children. I cannot personally imagine anyone else raising them but me!
My advice for husbands of SAHMs would be to be work on being more understanding and communicative. Understand that your wife is also filling a role and is never ever “off duty.” She gives her undivided attention to your children while somehow trying to find a way to get chores and other things done.
This is a reminder for the husband of stay at home mom that put yourself in her shoes. If you feel it would be difficult, work on giving her specific times throughout the days you are off from work and tell her to go do something special. This could range from a simple bath to the spa, the mall, a date with you while you hire a sitter, etc. Work on implementing this one time per week. She’s going to need it, and doing this will completely transform your marriage.
Check her blog: www.accomplishedfamily.com
Mary Lentz – San Antonio, TX USA
Bachelor of Science
I chose to be a stay-at-home-mom because I didn’t want a stranger raising my children. I believe my children are a blessing and that it’s my responsibility to raise them.
The best advice I can give a husband as a stay-at-home mom is to give your wife “me time.” Everyone needs time away from their job and moms are no different. Give her time to be kid-free, to do something fun or something for herself. Let her do a craft, a hobby, or go out with friends every now and then.
Moms need a work-life balance too. I think it’s easy to forget, but stay-at-home moms get tired of being in the house all day. As much as we love our kids, we also need a break to relax and recharge. Make sure to prioritize that time for her.
Also, don’t forget to encourage your wife daily. Being a say-at-home-mom is a thankless job and we often feel invisible. We might sometimes feel that we don’t matter because we aren’t bringing in a paycheck. We want to know that what we do everyday matters, that we are valuable – just as valuable as if we were working. Let her know how much you appreciate her.
Check her blog: Www.mybeautifulmess.net
McKayla Butcher – Utah
My name is McKayla, and I live in Utah with my husband and our three-year-old daughter. I went to school for medical assisting, and I had every intention of going back to work after I had my baby. But as I got closer and closer to having her, I just knew I couldn’t do it.
As soon as I held her, I knew I didn’t want to leave her side. I didn’t want to miss a minute of her growing and learning. And out of all of the decisions I’ve made in life, being a SAHM has been one of the best. But that being said, it took its toll on all of my relationships, including my marriage!
I’ve been a stay at home mom for three and a half years now, and when I was asked to think of a piece of advice I would give to a husband of a SAHM, I knew exactly what it would be; don’t make her ask. What I mean by that is, don’t always wait for her to ask you to help her with something. A husband should help stay at home mom.
Take the initiative and go out of your way to do something. Whether it’s getting the kids ready for bed, cleaning up after dinner, taking the trash out, whatever you see that she might need help with. I know that after a long days work, you just want to relax. But I can assure you that she needs rest too. Just doing one extra thing a day without being asked to do so will make such a difference. You will be surprised how happy it will make her, and how much she will do for you in return!
Check her blog: www.motivationformom.com
Jacqueline Gilchrist – Ontario, Canada
I’m currently on maternity leave so I am a stay-at-home mom right now, but I will be returning to my job this year.
My advice for husbands of stay at home moms is Be understanding. Just because a SAHM is at home doesn’t mean she’s doing nothing. You should have the value of a stay at home spouse. While taking care of your own child or children is the best job in the world, but it’s still kinda job. It’s arguably even more difficult than a day job is.
In a regular 9-5 job, you have breaks. When you’re a SAHM, sometimes you’re working all day long. When your child is napping, you’re doing the laundry. Sometimes the house just isn’t going to be cleaned or dinner is not going to be prepared when you get home.
I understand the dads of stay-at-home moms are tired from a long day’s work. At the end of the day, a husband and wife are a team. Both people need to work together to get things done. If a SAHM is unable to put away the dishes or vacuum the floors, the husband can do it.
Check her blog: www.mommoneymap.com
Being a husband of stay at home mom, your wife needs more support. Doing everyday household chores and raising kids is not an easy go job. Learn above best pieces of advice given by other SAHM to make your wife feel proud about the choice she made.
I want to say thanks to all my friends who join this discussion. And I am leaving this conversation open for you.
As a husband of SAHM, what do you do to support your wife? Do you help her?
Being a stay at home mom, what type of help you want from your partner?
I can’t wait to read your journey as a parent.